We always like to share a wide range of experiences and personal stories with you and today’s guest post is one which we haven’t covered before. Our feeding stories have covered breastfeeding, formula feeding, tongue tie and more which all show that there are very different and personal reasons when it comes to feeding your baby. Today’s post is by Isobel who chose to exclusively express and bottle feed her baby for a number of reasons. I’ll hand you over to Isobel to tell you all about her experience.
Although I’d always imagined that I would breastfeed any children that I had, when I got pregnant with my daughter, Rose, it was just not something that I could picture myself doing. So I made the unusual choice to exclusively express my milk from birth, luckily my husband James was totally on board with the idea and we’ve found that for us it has been the perfect way to feed Rose.
To my knowledge exclusively expressing from birth is not very common in the UK and I really didn’t know what to do. I began by speaking to my midwife and health visitor about it and if I am honest the reactions I got were frustrating, they didn’t seem to be able to get their heads around why I didn’t just want to put the baby on my breast. They struggled to answer my questions about what I would do in hospital when the baby was just born and how I would give her my colostrum, they just kept trying to encourage me to try ‘normal’ breastfeeding. So I turned to the internet to find out more. Here I found interesting stories about women who exclusively expressed, what their timetables for expressing were and why they had ended up expressing, but I still struggled to find much information on preparing for expressing before the baby arrives. I had read that I would need to hand express to start with, so spent hours googling this and trying to find videos of how to do it (whilst hoping that my neighbours wouldn’t see me watching these videos through the windows!). This is something I would recommend all women who are wanting to breastfeed or express do, it is really simple once you’ve got the hang of it but I imagine trying to work out how to do it once your baby is here is stressful and hard. I also did a lot of research into what type of pump to get, I decided on the Medela freestyle double pump as it seemed to be the best on the market and I would be using it a lot, I got it at a baby event so got £100 off the rrp which was great.
Whilst still pregnant I started to think about expressing a stock of colostrum to freeze before Rose was born, again a google search helped a bit here as I wanted to know if it was safe to do so, it’s not recommended before 38 weeks pregnant because expressing can cause your uterus to contract and potentially induce labour. I ordered some sterilised syringes online and when my maternity leave started I would spend 15-20 minutes a day expressing by hand, and eventually by pump, then freezing the colostrum I got out. To start with I was only getting a very small amount, but the amounts increased every day and soon I had a good stock frozen ready for my daughter. In fact I had to stop expressing at 41 weeks pregnant as I didn’t have enough space for it all in the freezer!
We took some frozen syringes of colostrum into hospital with us when I went into labour and the midwife put them into their freezer for me, I did this so I didn’t have to worry about expressing as soon as Rose was born and could just enjoy cuddles with her. In the end I had a fairly traumatic last 30 minutes of my labour and Rose was rushed into intensive care. As awful as it was, I felt lucky to not have to worry about how I was going to feed Rose and James was able to bring my freezer stock of colostrum into the neonatal unit; the nurses were all quite shocked at the amount that I had managed to stockpile! The shock of the labour definitely had an impact on when my milk came in but I think that because I’d already built up my colostrum supply I did not see as much of an impact as I might have done if I hadn’t expressed prior to Rose’s birth.
Rose came home after five days in intensive care and then the fun really began! To start with, whilst James was on paternity leave, he did all the feeds and I would ‘express on demand’ whenever Rose wanted a feed. In the first few weeks this was about every 3-4 hours and I would express for about 15 minutes at a time. We quickly got into a routine and there was a constant supply of breastmilk stored in the fridge, as well as bottles that James could grab to feed Rose with – a benefit of breastmilk is that you don’t need to warm it up so Rose has it cold, straight from the fridge. I had made myself a pumping bra by cutting a couple of holes in an old sports bra so that I could be hands free whilst pumping, this turned out to be very useful as I could cook, eat and scroll through Instagram whilst expressing.
When James went back to work I stopped expressing quite as much cutting down to about 6 times a day, including once in the middle of the night when Rose had her feed. I have a good milk supply and one problem that cutting down my pumping sessions so quickly caused was mastitis, I would also get engorged breasts quite a lot so quickly learnt good massaging techniques for blocked ducts. Very early on I also had problems with blisters on my nipples, which were caused by using the wrong sized nipple flanges when I used the pump that the hospital provided whilst I was staying there. These made it painful to pump, but I applied lots of lansinoh and also lubricated the inside of the flange with a bit of olive oil when I pumped to help, it took about two weeks to clear up.
I’ve now been exclusively expressing for Rose for four months and although there have been a few not so great moments; on the whole it has been amazing. We’ve settled into a really good routine and I express three or four times a day, normally at 6am, 12noon, 5pm and 10pm, getting between 200-300ml each time. I’ve found a few useful pins on Pinterest for the amounts of milk to give to Rose as she has got older, and she takes around 800ml a day over five feeds. Expressing really works for us as a family, James loves that he is so involved in the feeding and has had the opportunity to bond with Rose in a way that men don’t always get. One of my anxieties about it early on was that it would stop me from being able to do things, but we have gone on numerous trips away in the past few months and it hasn’t been a problem. I have managed to express in the car, at a flower show and even in front of the gas man when he came to read the meter (that one was less planned!). I think that the secret behind our success was starting to express before Rose was born and therefore being confident about how feeding would work for us, it certainly saved us sleepless nights early on.
Our next challenge is going to be weaning Rose onto formula as we are doing shared parental leave and I will be going back to work soon. I have heard that if you mix formula in with the breastmilk it will help them slowly get used to the taste, but any advice anyone has would be very useful.
My Expressing Tips and tricks:
Start expressing pre-baby or at least have a go at hand expressing so that you know what you are doing.
Ensure that you are using the right sized flange (nipple funnel bit) for your nipple to prevent blisters or soreness.
Buy or make a handsfree pumping bra, I cut a couple of holes into an old sports crop top.
Have a hand pump for when you are out and about.
While your milk supply is still settling down do a bit a breast massage before pumping to help with any blockages.
Get people to help with feeding, they love it and it means you can pump (or have a cup of coffee and some cake) whilst they feed your baby.
I don’t sterilise my pump kit after each use, I pop it in a sandwich bag in the fridge which saves a lot of time.
Image by Little Beanies Photography.
I really admire your ability to continue expressing for so long! I expressed for about 4 weeks – my baby wouldn’t latch and to be honest I didn’t really like it anyway. We started expressing but as soon as my hubby went back to work, I couldn’t keep up with the physical side of feeding and pumping and taking care of my baby. If only I had the ingenious hands free bra!! It was a shame as I produced a lot of milk and after we started formula we found he had an allergy to milk and had to get a specialist formula milk prescribed.
It’s also worth saying that any formula milk can be given cold, we used to make up bottles for night feeds and he would have them straight out of the fridge, much to my mothers dismay! He never bothered with it being cold and it was so much easier. He then had a warm bottle before bed, which lead to him knowing that it was bedtime I think.
Anyway well done, it’s such an achievement and I hope you can continue as long as you want to.
Thankyou, the handsfree bra was a lifesaver! I think it also helped that Rose napped a lot early on so I had lots of time to express.
That’s great to know that I can give formula cold, we’ve been giving Rose the premade stuff at night but she’s started going off it, i’m hoping that she’s just weaning herself off the night feed! X
I’m exclusively expressing too, not through choice really, more because feeding directly from the boob didn’t work out for us despite lots of trying and advice from all over the place! Completely agree that finding info on exclusively expressing is tough and health professionals don’t always want to give you the info either. One thing I would say is that if you have a hungry baby like mine, expressing can be very very tough. I’m sure you have had hard moments too, And you have done so well getting to 4 month’s exclusively expressing. My boy went through a phase of drinking up to 1.25litres a day of milk, which has meant there wasn’t much time to build up a fridge or freezer stash and it is tough when I have days and sometimes nights by myself to get all the pumping done in between feeds, especially when he is fussy and doesn’t want to be put down. Due to reflux he was feeding every hour in the day for a while but that has settled now and everything feels much more manageable. Well done to you for doing so well with expressing! Xx
Well done to you for keeping it up with a super hungry baby, we’re lucky that Rose hasn’t ever cluster fed, it must be so hard. I really wouldn’t have been able to do it on my own, my husband doing so many of the feeds when he was around was needed.
I really think there needs to be more info provided by the NHS on how it can work as it’s so hard to find useful stuff. X
I also think more info for dads on how to support, and how hard it can be to be at home with a young baby 🙂
Expressing before birth is a great idea, I found it really tough to try anything new after my babies had arrived. I hated breastfeeding, and expressing/bottle feeding from the start might have meant that Henry would have been breastfed for longer, without the stress of persuading him to swap from boob to bottle.
Hope you get on okay back at work 🙂
Thankyou, i’m due back at work next Thursday, I’m looking forward to it at the moment but I imagine I’ll be getting first day back nerves on Wednesday night! X
What a brilliant post! You should be really proud of yourself. I formula fed my first baby after an absolute nightmare with breastfeeding and it was a decision that was right for us. To be honest I didn’t even think about expressing.
I am now pregnant with number 2 and thinking about feeding again. I really want to try to breastfeed again but can’t afford to let myself get into the same state over it as i did the first time, as it’s not fair on my little girl.
Having read this I will definitely be trying to express. Great tips on preparing before birth!
Thank you xxxx
Hope that trying expressing before birth helps you out for baby number two.
One of the things that made me not want to breastfeed was being worried about how I might cope mentally if I struggled with it. So I really hope that everything goes well for you 😊 x
I have successfully managed to breastfeed my second baby after exclusively expressing with my first. I too got myself in a state the first time as had only ever prepared for breastfeeding!
This time around, I think hand expressing in the late stages of pregnancy definitely helped prepare my body and my mind, and I also felt more confident asking questions in hospital before I went home, as well as to midwife/HV on visits.
Best of luck with your second feeding experience, I hope it all goes smoothly for you x
Thank you for this post! I expressed for 8 weeks but found it so phstivsllt demanding. I’m pregnant again and will definitely look into expressing pre birth.
Physically *
This is a great post and good to show that there are options out there for mothers. I must say I did not enjoy expressing. This probably came from my experience of my first few days in hospital. I couldn’t get the latch right and I spent, what felt like endless hours, trying to breastfeed, syringing and expressing. Once we eventually got the hang of breastfeeding, I just didn’t really know when to express. It’s true that there is very little advice about expressing. I joined a breastfeeding group and here a very knowledgeable health visitor talked through how to express, when to, how to store etc. Turns out my daughter did not take to bottles at all and so much of my expressed milk went down the sink. It’s actually heartbreaking seeing your hard work being poured away. When I started reading this post I thought, oh God that seems like too much hard work but it’s great that it’s worked out for Isobel. I guess everything about keeping your baby fed and happy can be hard work at some point. At times I hated breastfeeding and felt it was too hard and I couldn’t go on. Others times I thought this is so easy I’m so glad I can just stick her on my boob without faffing about with bottles. It’s all relative to what is right for you and the routine you fall in to. I think there should definitely be more information about things like expressing, combination feeding using nipple shields etc. Thank you for sharing.
What a great post – thank you! I am really keen on the whole expressing before baby is here idea and had never thought about it before. Although the link to the videos doesn’t seem to work. Can you pop the link on please?
Here you go: http://med.stanford.edu/newborns/professional-education/breastfeeding/hand-expressing-milk.html x
I exclusively breastfeed but express a feed every so often so my husband can feed her. I absolutely hate pumping as I feel like a cow(!) so big respect to you, I think anyone who can juggle time expressing, prepping bottles and looking after a baby is awesome!
On a side note, my daughter has a bottle of formula probably once a week so mummy can have some wine, and we didn’t have to do any transition, she just drank it as if it was my milk with no problem so hopefully it’ll be as easy for you too.
You can still have vino and breastfeed! 🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻 = Massive Hurrah
Great to finally read a post about exclusively expressing – I can’t understand why there isn’t more information about this as an alternative to breast or bottle. It really worked for us as a family – I exclusively expressed for my first for 5 months (after a traumatic early birth and stillbirth of a twin) and with my next for 3.5. It was much trickier the second time round, trying to find time to express with an active toddler and a newborn but if you can establish a routine, have a supportive partner who will share the night feeds while you’re pumping, and can get a freezer stock built up, it really is a great option. Well done!
Respect to you Isobel for what you have achieved! I breastfed for nine months, with my husband doing occasional feeds of expressed/formula. I went back to work at 7 months as we did shared parental leave, my son would have bottles of formula/expressed with his Dad in the day (I could express at work, its worth finding out if thats possible for you if you wanted to do it) and breastfed by me morning/evening. I can recommend a facebook group called “Breast and combi feeding yummy mummies” (terrible name I know) but people are very knowledgeable with advice on there and there would be bound to be someone who has done what you are going to do who can offer advice. I have read about the mixing formula/bm on there before. Very non judgemental group unlike some of the others I’ve been on! I suspect she will be fine with the formula, the hard bit is getting them on a bottle if they are not used to it. Good luck!
Wow that’s amazing, I managed 10 months of pumping due to a tongue tie that couldn’t be cut. I never got anywhere as much at each pumping session and was pumping every 3 hours for months! I was also sterilising the pump
In between each time because I couldn’t get my head around storing it in the fridge. Then one day it clicked 🙈 this time I will definitely be harvesting my colostrum in hope it helps with the milk supply and also so that first bit of pressure isn’t there! I did feel housebound for the first 4/5 months and felt it was all I ever did. This time I’m going to try and be a bit more relaxed if I can’t breastfeed again. Thanks for the tips. We have a freestyle and i did the Same with the primark crop top! X
This is really interesting, with my first child, my milk didn’t come in for nearly a week so ended up formula feeding due to lots of issues. I was thinking about expressing pre birth this time around to try and encourage my milk earlier?. I am going to speak my Midwife at my next appointment and try to get some advice!
Wow. What a great post. I agree there is not enough info for families in the UK regarding this. I exclusively pumped for my son from day 5 until he was 5 months old. Then I continued to pump but added in the occasional formula feed until he was 8 months.
It wasn’t the easiest thing I’ve ever attempted but with a bit of planning and forward thinking I managed it. It’s hard because you can’t just whip out a boob or make up a bottle if they have a growth spurt or they want a fed ahead of when you’ve planned. But trust me, nothing gets that milk let down going quicker than a crying hungry baby!!
I read that a breast fed baby should have 24 Oz in a 24 hour period so I apportioned that out by how many feeds he had a day. I always pumped for the feed ahead and could never pump enough to freeze any. He started sleeping through the night at ten weeks (with the help of a dream feed) and I wasn’t going to pump at night while my baby slept and so I would save up ‘extras’ in the fridge throughout the day for the first feed of the day. In the mornings I could pump 13/14 ozs most days which got me ahead for the day. I would put my little boy in a bouncy chair and we’d sing songs and talk to pass the time.
The hardest part for me was other people’s attitudes. The HV basically told me I wouldn’t continue. The breast feeding specialist refused to help me. My mother in law asked me why I bothered. But I’m really glad I did it. I didn’t really plan to do it for so long but I just took each day as it came. I always had a few spare bottles of instant aptimel (just in case) and that got me through and made me not panic. I rarely used them actually and once had to throw some away as the dates expired.
Good luck to all the mamma’s planning to do this or expressing now. It can feel lonely but it’s nice to know others have done the same.
Oh I should add. I expressed because my son couldn’t latch and my husband had just bought a Medela swing pump. The plan was to express to get his weight up and then get him to latch. But I struggled with seeing the HV/specialist forcing him to latch after all he’d been through. I would have bought the double pump if I’d have known I’d do it for 8 months. I stopped at 8 months as I went back to work and wouldn’t have had time in the mornings.
I’m not saying the HV’s face when at my son’s 6 month check up when she asked how is he feeding and I replied “expressed breast milk” was the reason I’m glad I continued but it certainly felt good.
I exclusively expressed for a year with my first baby until she moved on to cow’s milk at one. I had fully expected to breastfeed (without the middle man!) but various complications and no milk meant a scary trip to A&E after baby continued losing weight. I started expressing, but still tried her on the boob each time for 6 weeks until I reluctantly accepted that it just wasn’t working for us in the way I expected. I continued expressing with my little mantra of every day counts…I had hoped to get to 3 months, which became a target of 6 months and finally a year! It helped that I had a very sleepy baby so expressed after every feed while she slept. I’m not going to say it was easy…I lived in fear of running out as only had one or two spare feeds in the fridge rather than a plentiful supply. I certainly cried more than once over spilt milk!!
For me though, it was the right decision for us and watching her thrive on my milk eventually was a very proud moment after all the guilt and hard work. I never quite got over the fact that I wasn’t able to breastfeed her conventionally and I genuinely think that contributed to us planning a sibling with a two year age gap as I so wanted to give it another go! Lo and behold, baby number two arrived with a textbook perfect birth and fed beautifully. I dutifully expressed for the first couple of months including pre-natal for a freezer full of colostrum and then milk…only to find she refused a bottle! Haha. So every baby is certainly unique!
I love that you’ve written about exclusively expressing and got people talking about it. It seems to be fairly common in America but so much less so here that my health visitors applauded me but were convinced my supply would eventually dry up. The kellymom website was the only source of good information I could find and it was invaluable for keeping my spirits up when I wasn’t sure I could continue.
Best of love and luck to everyone who chooses this path – I hope all of these comments help you feel that it might be tricky, but it IS possible if it’s what you want to do! xxx
I had planned to breast feed but my little girl wouldn’t latch in hospital. My husband has terrible allergies so I really wanted to persevere with breast feeding so I expressed and it worked fantastically for us. I pumped and my hubby or any family member could feed her whenever necessary, she has breast milk all day then at night she had formula purely (perhaps a little selfishly on my behalf) because it made her sleep much longer. I continued for 16 weeks then I admit I stopped. My daughter slept through the night from 5 weeks (don’t ask me how or why we were just lucky I guess) but I couldn’t bare having to wake to pump during the night when she wasn’t waking me.
It’s so so lovely to read about someone else who expressed, I felt so alone as no one else seemed to do it and all the midwives kept saying was the keep trying breast feeding x
Sorry for the late post but wanted to comment to say well done on exclusively expressing for so long. Having done so for my twins since they were 4 days old I know how hard it is. But also how rewarding it is when they thrive on your milk despite the difficulties. I did so until roughly 6 and a half month but as my milk supply started to decrease we then introduced some formula at the nighttime feed before we ran out of breastmilk in the freezer. As you mentioned we mixed breastmilk with formula to get them used to the taste and it worked well with us. We may have had an advantage in that we’d started weaning so they were used to new tastes but I think it’s a good way to introduce formula.
As everyone has said there’s not much out there so always lovely to hear from others who’ve gone down this route. I also looked at a website called exclusive pumping which had good tips on schedules and how to drop pumps (at 7 months I’m doing 4 a day).
What I didn’t know is that colostrum harvesting can lead to early labour. I was actively encouraged to harvest from 32 weeks as with twins there was increased risk of prematurity so it was a good way to ensure supply before they arrived and like you I found it took the stress out of feeding initially.
Good luck for the return to work. X
I sadly was never able to breastfeed 🙁 I used https://organicbaby.la/collections/holle-organic-formula instead, but I think it was pretty ok 🙂 My boy liked it and it’s organic.
greets
Laura