Things I’ve Learnt As My Girls Grow Up

It’s hit me recently that Molly is no longer a little girl. Yes, she’s only six but in the past few months she has changed so much. Not just physically but in her mannerisms and personality.

I’m finding it tough and I’m not really sure how I feel about it all. Then I get scared that Alice is four and another year or two and she will be the same. Both my little girls all grown up. It’s that delicate balancing act of wanting to slow down time and keep them small but also giving them the space to grow and develop in to the amazing people I know they will be.

A lot of you have commented about wanting posts about older children. I can’t quite cover the teenage years yet but with a six and a four year old I thought I would share some of the things I’ve learnt in the last few years.

You won’t miss the baby stage as much as you thought you would. Well I don’t anyway. Yes I look at those cute baby pictures and remember those sweet toddler moments but I am embracing having my life back to a degree. I am well and truly past the baby stage and I can honestly say I love it. I have time to think and breathe (well sometimes!) and generally get on with life. If I want to do a quick workout for 30 minutes I know they will happily play barbies whilst I do so. If I’m taking a shower I’m not thinking I hear crying as soon as I step in. Having that bit of time for me makes the world of difference and means I can appreciate the time I spend with them. Even if it is bribing them to get dressed for school or to clean their teeth!

They will amaze you every day. Once they reach school age they just become these completely different little people. So many new things to share with you, information they want to share and the immense pride they have when they run out of school to tell me that they got on gold or silver that day. It makes me smile so much.

They have a whole other world you aren’t really part of. Once they start school there are suddenly these six hours a day that they fill with their own friendships, learning and fun. Things happen in those six hours you know nothing about and probably never will unless your child happens to impart all the information on you. Molly used to tell me everything that had gone on at school but recently it’s changed to ‘Ugh, I can’t remember’. Useful.

If you have a shy child that will change. Molly used to cower away from everyone, crying when people she didn’t know came near her. She does still sometimes grab on to me if she’s unsure but watching the way she has grown in confidence over the last few years is one of the reasons I don’t want to keep her little. Alice has never struggled in the that department mind you (That girl needs to be on the stage!) but for Molly it has meant the world to see the shy three year old change in to this happy and confident six year old. She’s surrounded by friends, sticks up for herself at school and tries her hardest always.

They will start to answer you back and have mood swings to rival a teenager. In recent months I have found Molly being narky with Alice a lot more, being short in her responses and there is a lot of eye rolling going on. She has even taken to grunting at me sometimes.

There may be love interests. Speaking of teenagers, can we talk about the boyfriend situation?!! Since Molly started school she has had a little boyfriend. Luckily it’s my friend’s little boy so I approve 🙂 They write love letters to each other which they pop in their book bags, stand coyly next to each other at pick up and generally have each other’s back. It still feels a bit odd though and I’m not sure how on earth I am going to cope when it’s all very real and you are having to deal with emotions and heartbreak.

You have to learn you can’t protect them from everything so matter how hard you try. You don’t realise how easy it was when they were small. Once they head off to the big world of school I have had to get used to those heart wrenching moments when someone has said something mean to them or try not to feel sad when Alice tells me she had no-one to play with at lunchtime. You have to let them work it out themselves and they will, believe me.

You will learn to appreciate the small things. Whilst I am embracing the changes I am also making a conscious effort to appreciate the every day. Those little moments that represent the person they are now. The little smiles, the silly dances and the hand holding. Every night before bed Alice asks me to ‘stay with her’ and normally I would say ‘mummy can’t right now as I have to go and tidy up/put washing on/make my tea’ but these last few weeks I’ve realised that those ten minutes lying quietly with her whilst she drifts off mean more than anything. The washing can wait and my tummy can rumble for a few minutes longer. There will be a day when she doesn’t want me to cuddle her or will be telling me to leave her alone so I’m going to enjoy it whilst I can.

Finally, don’t be scared of them growing up. It’s hard to accept your little one’s are no longer little but they still need your cuddles and most importantly your support. You will always be their mummy and deep down they will always be your your little baby. Enjoy watching them change in to these amazing human beings and be proud. Proud of what they achieve, proud of who they have become and proud that they are yours.

On that note I also wanted to use this post to say goodbye. Sadly I am moving on from the wonderful world of Rock My and it is with a heavy heart that I say that this will be my last post on Rock My Family. I want to thank you so much for all your support, advice and general chatter over the last few years. It’s been amazing being part of this little corner of the internet and I will miss this ‘virtual’ support group so much. You’ll never know how much your comments have made me smile on a daily basis and how much respect I have for each and every one of you navigating this world of parenting.

But, as I talk about above, change can be a good thing. It leads to new adventures and that is what life is all about. Whether they are small moments or big life changing decisions. Do what you love, keep smiling and remember, you’ve got this! I hope each and every one of you have the most magical adventures this year in whatever form they take.

Toodle-oo for now

x

mm

Lottie loves teaching her girls to be cake baking and crafting supremos. It may be messy but she wouldn’t have it any other way.
Follow Lottie on instagram @buttercreamanddreams

91 Comments. Leave new

Oh Lottie.

To start with, what a beautiful post! Reading about how your gorgeous girls are growing made me well up… And now I’m actually ugly crying into my coffee.

You know, I’ve loved this window into your world and the passion you’ve put into RMF. Most of all I will never EVER forget the support and encouragement you gave to me in the crazy times when I was a Mum to be (& since!) it meant a lot.

I’ll miss you my love. I hope fabulous things await you… Xx

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I’ll start crying too now! You are an amazing mum and you will never know how overjoyed I am that you got your happy ending. This parenting lark is tough but the absolute best. Big hugs to you and your little family xxx

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Oh Lottie what a beautiful post! Thank you. I’m sad to hear you’re leaving, having only started my motherhood journey in October with my own little lady, I’ve loved reading your posts and hearing about your girls. I hope whatever is in store for you next is just as wonderful

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Thank you Laura. You are still at the start of an amazing adventure so enjoy every second with your little girl. It’s the absolute best xxx

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This is beautifully written Lottie, and completely from the heart. Your girls are so lucky to have you. We are really going to miss having your bright and happy soul around. Big hugs xxxxxxxxx

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Thank you sweetie. It’s lovely writing about my two favourites. Will miss you all sooooo much too. Lots of love xxx

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Lottie, what a lovely post. I’m so sad to hear you’re leaving. I’ve loved reading your posts.

I hope you have many more amazing times with Ed and your girls x

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Thank you so much Louise xx

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Oh goodness me, Lottie this post should have come with a warning. After such beautiful words written straight from the heart to then hit us with the killer blow at the end, I can’t bear it 😢

You will be so missed, I’ve loved getting to know your voice and your family over the years in this virtual space. This post is a perfect example of your generous spirt, it’s honest but uplifting and was already making me feel positive about the future and what is to come with my little girl. Thank you.

I really hope you will consider continuing to blog in some capacity, you have such a talent for writing and it feels like we’re all parenting alongside you. I can’t cope with the thought of your not being there to impart words of wisdom any more!

I truly hope you have every success in your next chapter. I know that whatever it is your girls will be so proud. Sniff.

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Sorry!! It means the world to hear you write that and I may be a little teary at your comment. I have honestly loved every minute of writing for this wonderful little world. I will miss everyone’s comments and chatter as you really do need that little support group around you in whatever guise it takes. Wishing you lots of love and hugs for 2018. xxx

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You will be massively missed Lottie xx

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Miss you too. You do realise you are going to have to take up the crafting reign don’t you?! x

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Lovely post; I had tears in my eyes anyway, as one of my current mum worries is that my 2.5 year old already seems to be growing up too fast! But then reading that you were leaving really set me off!! I’m really going to miss your crafting and baking posts; you’ve always given me amazing rainy day ideas and I hope someone else at RMF picks up the mantle with these (honestly, keeping cookie dough in the freezer for fresh bakes anytime….genius).

All the luck in the world for your future xx

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The cookie dough is the best. In fact perhaps I need to make a fresh batch today. I’m thinking raspberry and white chocolate 🙂 I’m sure someone else will come up with some new crafty ideas for you and I’m so happy you have enjoyed them all. That makes me smile. All I can say is don’t worry too much about them growing up, it’s hard that they change so quickly but underneath it all you still see your little one xxx

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Lottie I am so sad we won’t be reading your words on RMF any more! But I wish you all the best for the next chapter, I really really do.

Great last post by the way……I found it very emotional, particularly the thought of six hours of the day I won’t have a clue how my baby’s world is shaping up. I was that horrid child who never shared any information and now I think oh my poor mum!! X

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Thank you Sarah. It’s like some weird time warp and it’s so strange not knowing what really went on. It’s different to when they are at nursery as now they are forging friendships and working away by themselves. I do get little updates from school but it’s the feeling that this is such a huge part of their life that I find hard. I basically try and extract as much information as I can on the walk home before they forget everything!! xxx

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How beautiful. I’m not sure what made me the most emosh, your words or the fact you are moving on. I will certainly miss your creativity & the brilliant ideas for parties, wrapping, crafting & cakes! I will have to refer to archives & hope you do some guest appearances. Thank you also for the serious & sensitive pieces you’ve shared. Good luck!
Much love, Liz xxx

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Thank you so much Liz. Hopefully there are a few things in the archives to keep you going for now 🙂 xxx

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What a post! Lots of luck Lottie, you’ll be missed.

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Thank you xxx

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As my little girl is approaching her first birthday I’m already starting to get a bit emotional and this just set me off again! 😂
I will really miss hearing about you and your lovely girls, thank you so much for your wonderful writing and best of luck

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Oh gosh, I’m feeling completely emotional about the growing up part but it is a lot of fun too. Big hugs xx

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Beautiful post. Thanks so much for all the amazing advice and support you’ve shared with us all here 😘

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Thanks Lynne x

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Lottie! What a beautifully written post – one day your girls will be able to read this and your other lovely posts and have some understanding of the utter joy and bittersweet sadness they have put you through!!
You are a great writer and I have so enjoyed your posts over the last 18 months that I have been an avid reader of RMF – you will be much missed!
All the best for your next endeavours – I am sure you will be fab and make your own mum proud!!

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Thank you so much Sarah for your lovely comment. I always mean to write them little letters and never do. Instead I might need to print out some posts from here and stick them in their baby book! xxx

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Ah I wasn’t expecting that ending, I’ve really enjoyed reading about your lovely girls and the last 18 months of motherhood have been accompanied by lots of laughs, inspiration and frantically searching through the archives for advice from this place, so many thanks for the helping hand along the way. Many many best wishes to you. X

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Sorry, perhaps I should have started with that part! So happy you have enjoyed the posts and I wish you lots of love and laughter with your own little one xx

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Oh dearie me, far too much for a Tuesday morning! Only yesterday, I was looking for one of your cake posts (tinkerbell/fairy/woodland theme?) to help a friend out with a cake query and I knew you had the very thing for her. All the best Lottie.

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Ah, thank you. The tinker bell party is the best though! xx

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Lottie this is such a lovely post. I want to say a MASSIVE thank you. Your posts really have seen me through those early toddler and baby days from having had two under under to knowing they will both be at school in the next couple of years 😭 I’m not the best at leaving comments but please know how much you’ve gotten me through some tough days and given me ideas for fun ones! You did some fashion posts a while back and they gave me some confidence to start finding myself again. I will miss hearing about your lovely girls but excited for you with your next adventure. Good luck xxxx

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Thank you so much of your lovely comment Ella, it means the world. I’m so happy that I have been able to help in some small way. Have a fabulous year xx

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Oh gosh even I’ve shed a tear and I don’t even have kids! But I have love me reading about my wonderful nieces 🙂 They certainly are growing up in to the most amazing girls who never fail to make me smile. Even when they are grumpy! Good luck sis, you’re going to smash it in the next adventure. Big love xxxxx

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Thanks nelly! Grumpy Alice is the best!! xx

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All the best Lottie, will miss your posts! Good luck for whatever you have lined up xo

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Thanks Helen xx

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Ah Lottie. You and your swoon worthy cakes will be missed.

If your coming back to agency life, I’m your gal for tips to get out the door in the morning. After 2 years of juggling work with mama responsibilities I think I’ve finally got it nailed. Maybe.

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Please share!! Returning to work full time in april with 11 month old twins and a 3yr old and have to leave by 7.30am so would love to hear any tips!!!!!!!

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Hell yes. Give me ALL the tips!! Also I fear I am going to feel really old walking back in. I remember going back after Molly five years ago and felt like I was surrounded by teenagers who were blaring out songs that hurt my ears. They looked at me like a grandma when I asked for radio two 🙂 Five years on I feel I need a whole new wardrobe just to step foot in the door! I’ll be lucky if I’ve had time to brush my hair before the school rush and commute but sure I’ll get there. Who knows, maybe our paths will cross in the agency world x

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Oh Lottie,
Such a beautifully written post! And definitely a tear jerker! Our little one is only two and already he is so grown up, and I’m already trying to cling on to time as it’s flying past!
Best of luck with your new adventures, you will be missed here! xxx

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Thanks Chloe. Definitely make the most of these early years before they head off to the big world of school xx

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Charlotte O'Shea
30th January 2018 9:05 am

Beautiful post Lottie, your girls are so lucky to have you as their Mum. You will be hugely missed by the team and the community xxx

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Thank you. Will miss everyone so much too x

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Lottiiiiieeeeeeee! Can you just stay a bit longer? Gorgeous words as always. We will miss you so much xx

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Beckyyyyyyyyyy, I wish I could. Miss you already xx

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Lottie this post is just utter… perfection. Such beautiful words, your girls will love looking back on this one day and seeing how you wrote with such love and luminosity. We are really, really going to miss you. I’ll never forget within the first 5 minutes of meeting you I knew you would always be the smiley one. It’s been a pleasure xxx

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Thank you my lovely Laura. I’ll make sure I keep plastering a big smile on my face every day xxx

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Oh no, but where am I going to get all the lovely recipes and crafting ideas from now?! Sorry to hear you are leaving but I wish you all the best for the adventures you have in your future. Lovely post, as always. I was thinking just this morning that, even though the early starts and midnight cuddles are painful, there is something so lovely about enjoying every moment as they will go too quickly…

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Hopefully someone else will pick up the baking posts for you 🙂 Enjoy those cuddles xx

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Lottie , your words are so beautiful . Just recently my little 3 and a half year old has been asking me to ‘sleep just 5 minutes’ with her at bedtime , I was going to resist , but like you , i have thought – this won’t last forever I’m getting my snuggle time while I can.
I have always enjoyed your posts and I shall miss hearing about you and your family.
Best wishes for your next adventures x

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Those five minutes are the best way to end the day. I always leave her room feeling happy. Big hugs xx

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Oh Lottie, you will be very much missed but good luck for your next step in life. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to write for RMF in 2016; I loved sharing my pregnancy experience and the birth of Franklin here and it was an honour and a pleasure to do so. Wishing you and your family all the best for your future xxxx

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Thank you so much Alice and we loved having you on here. Hope you and your little family are all well x

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Such a lovely post, RMF readers will miss you lots. Good luck in your new adventures! x

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Thank you Katie xx

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Lottie! Just came over here from Instagram as I nearly had actual kittens when I read you were leaving. Who is going to provide me with Boden girlswear edits now?!? I’ll miss your voice on here, hope you have time to drop in once in a while.

All the best in your new ventures xxx

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🙁 Thank you for popping over, it means so much. Hopefully one of the team can share my love of Boden with you! I haven’t made any purchases for a while so I probably need to restock soon. xxx

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What a beautifully written post – it’s amazing to hear your experience of the girls growing up and the new joys to behold.

I’m so sad to read that you’re leaving RMF and want to say a massive thank you for all your hard work in making this such a supportive part of the internet, and all your wonderful posts and editing. I wish you the absolute best in your new adventure and all the happiness xxx

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Thank you Sophie and thank you too for being part of this little community. It’s been lovely sharing it all with you. xxx

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Oh Lottie I’m so gutted you’re going 🙁 🙁 I love your posts and I will really miss them! Wishing you the best of luck for whatever you are moving on to and I hope we may still see the odd guest post from you now and again?! Thank you for all you’ve shared on RMF! x

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Thank you Sarah, it’s so nice hearing from all our lovely readers. Big hugs x

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Lottie – I just wanted to say thank you for all the excellent posts, I genuinely have made the craft suggestions, baked your cake recipes and literally printed out your guide to Devon when we went there on holiday – it was sooo good! The other day on RMF there were lots of comments about a ‘lack of passion’ from the writing and I felt for you because I thought it must be hard not to sit there and take it personally but please don’t. That is why I am leaving this comment to say there are loads of us who have loved your posts and have learnt so much from them. Also the shopping buys have been epic (I have the mint bed you recommended for my little boy and it is lovely ;))
You have done a fab job – good luck x

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Oh Nicola, thank you so much for your lovely comment. Our readers are the best. It’s so lovely to hear that the posts and recommendations have been so helpful and excellent choice on the mint bed. I’m planning a few more purchases from the Flexa collection to add to Alice’s room. They now do the range in some fab new colours to co-ordinate as well. Anyway, enough shopping chat and thank you for being ace. Might bump in to you on the beaches of Salcombe if you visit again xx

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A wonderful post Lottie, I am so sorry to see you go. Your writing was always so warm and genuine and relatable (am I allowed to say you’re my favourite?!).

Wishing you a whole ton of luck in the next stage of your adventure xxx

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Thank you so much Fionnula. You probably shouldn’t say but I’ll let you on this occasion 🙂 xxx

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Goodbye lovely lady. We will all miss you so much x

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Will miss you so much too x

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Lottie, thank you so much for such a beautiful post! Our little one is only 18 months and I’m already having moments of ‘when did he become so grown-up’??

Also, thank you for all your wonderful work on RMF, I’ve loved reading your posts and all the effort you put into the variety posts over the years. All the best for your future!

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Thank you Maike, that means a lot xx

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Ohhhhh Lottie! I read your IG post the other day and was worried this was coming! You will be missed, RMF was so shaped by you and Molly and Alice too! Will miss you deeply but will be stalking you on IG for the foreseeable as you take on new challenges and adventures.

Xxxx

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Stalk away Lucy! I’ll be keeping up to date with your adventures too 🙂 xx

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All the best, Lottie. You wrote a post about the age gap between your two girls and it came at a great and reassuring time for me. I was pregnant with my second and there was only 17 months between them and I was terrified. But your post made me feel so reassured that we would all be okay and from that point and going back to re-read it when I needed too, it was so very comforting. So a very big thank you for that! Enjoy your next adventure!

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Thank you and I’m so happy to hear my ramblings helped in some way and sounds like you have survived two under two! Have fun with your little ones xx

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Nooo- you can’t leave. Your posts are always my favourite and I sooo look forward to reading them. You may even have inspired my choice of name for my 2nd daughter, Alice! Good luck with whatever you do next! Xx

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Oh thank you so much for saying that Sara. And excellent choice on name 🙂 xx

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Lots of love and hugs Lottie alway xxxx

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Big hugs back xx

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Good luck Lottie! I’ve so enjoyed reading your posts – my two girls have the same age gap (I’m in the thick of the baby stage now) and I’ve found your thoughts really helpful. Especially the post about returning to work pregnant (😬) and handling 2 under 2 – all the best for your next venture x

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Thank you Helen and sounds like we have had a similar experience! All good fun but so worth it xx

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What a lovely post – my little one is only two but I already think about him growing up and becoming less reliant on me and even though it will be nice to get a bit more time for me it is so sad to think about! Thank you for all your great posts on here and good luck in whatever you do next (I’ll continue to admire your gorgeous cakes on Insta!) Xx

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Thank you Amanda and I totally get all the feels about not wanting them to grow up. I’ll get backing a few new creations to post soon xx

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Lottie I am so sad that you won’t be writing on here anymore, I have loved your posts and looked forward to reading them. I wish you all the very best in your future ventures

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Thank you Lindsey. I shall miss being here writing for you all xx

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Oh no! I will miss you and your lovely posts! This was just yet another really good one and I thank you for everything you did for RM and its readers. I wish you all the best for the changes and new adventures in your life!

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Thank you so much Anja. Lots of love xxx

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Hi Lottie – a little late to comment… although I did read the post yesterday, I wasn’t sure what I wanted to say. I think though I just want to join everyone else who has already commented in saying thank you for your wonderful posts, I have enjoyed reading them over the last few years, and will miss your contributions to RMF. Best of luck in your new ventures.

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Thank you so much for popping back Rebecca, it means a lot. It has been so lovely reading everyone’s comments. xxx

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Another late commenter, I was computerless yesterday and missed your post. Firstly, what an absolutely stunning piece of writing and picture of parenthood. You’ve inspired me to lie with Ethan tonight instead of mumbling excuses as to why I need to leave.

Secondly, mega sad face. I am going to SO miss your lovely self. I wish you all the very best on the next step and have a request that you please keep Insta updated with news of you and your beautiful family. Thank you for everything xo

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Thank you so much Naomi and make sure you do sit and give him those extra cuddles. You won’t regret it! Big hugs xx

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Oh my, I can’t believe this is your last post. Your posts have always been distinctive and I have taken on so much from you since being pregnant to a now mum of a nearly two year old. Wishing you all the best for the next chapter and of course lots of adventures with your little crew.

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Thank you so much Tracey. Glad I’ve been able to impart a few words of wisdom in some form or other. Lots of love for 2018 xxx

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