“Are you going to find out what you’re having?” has been the first question that probably 90% of people have asked Anthony and I when they have learned about the pregnancy.

I think like most mamas to be, I just want to have a healthy baby that arrives safely into the world. I’m genuinely not that fussed about what sex it happens to be. Before I fell pregnant I did have a slight preference for wanting a boy. I see how Anthony and his brother get on. They are so alike and have a great relationship and I wonder if that’s due to them being the same sex. I also see how my friends with sisters share clothes, nights out etc too. It’s not to say I’m not close to my brother but I do wonder if the bond between same sex siblings is any stronger than that of the relationships between differing sexes? Probably not if you were to delve into it deeply enough.

As I said, before falling pregnant I had a slight preference for another boy. Then I saw the baby at my scan. And I couldn’t give two hoots what it turns out to be. I feel nervous at the thought of having a girl. I mean, I know I’m a girl but I’ve never had to deal with a girly baby before. But then surely a baby is a baby right? And I’d be freaking myself out for no reason. Then there’s those people who are desperate for it to be a girl; for me to experience the bond with a daughter as well as a son, to have someone I can relate to or that can better relate to me. But I don’t feel like that. If I ended up with 4 boys I think I’d still be over the moon with my lot and content that I was given the task of raising a brood of boys.

But, back to the question in hand… Will we be finding out the sex of our baby at our 20 week anomaly scan… Which is next week! How I am almost half way there already I will never know. Anthony is firmly placed in the yes corner. There was part of him that wanted to know with Leo but he understood my stance on not finding out to have that experience of a complete surprise. I thought from day one that Leo was a boy so I wasn’t at all surprised when it turned out he was. Well, still maybe a little bit.

Initially, I was in the no camp again whereas Anthony has wanted to know from the start. He is excited (and he gets excited about very few things in life believe me!), he is impatient, he wants to visualise what our family will be like in 5 months time and most importantly he wants to prepare. I always found that a strange thing for people to say. What can finding out the sex help you to prepare for? A certain colour of clothes or paint in the nursery? Ultimately, your baby doesn’t care about either of those things so first time round, that argument never persuaded me. But, when Leo has told me on multiple occassions that he wants the baby to be a boy I feel we are going to absolutely need some time to prepare him in case it is a girl. The last thing I want is for him to be disappointed at meeting his new sibling.

And so anyway, I was against, then I was for, then I was against again but the more the pregnancy progresses, the more impatient I am finding myself. I feel like the excitement level is the same… Whether I find out next week or in 5 months time. I will still be thrilled at the fact that I have an actual real life baby… regardless of it’s sex. If the sonographer asks if we want to know I’m not sure I’ll be able to control myself from shouting yes!

I don’t believe there are really any pros and cons in whether or not you find out… just doing whatever you want to is right wether thats a surprise at 5 months or a surprise at 9 months.

So, are you/did you find out? If you are, will you be telling people? Or are you in for the long haul with the big reveal at the end? Did knowing help you prepare?


Image by Divine Day Photography