It’s not often the team become incensed by some of the bullshit drivel you see banded about on social media. It’s more often than not an eye roll followed by forgetting all about whatever it was that really wasn’t worth our time in the first place. Then there was the Victoria Beckham debacle over kissing your kids specifically on the lips.
I mean, WTF was that? Seriously, the world has gone mad. Mabel nearly always goes in for a smacker on the chops, be it Daddy, Grandad, Granny, me, ahem – any of the boys at nursery (this might be slightly concerning admittedly but at least she’s affectionate and enjoying life..)
The combined outrage the team shared at a meeting last week and a recent post on my personal instagram on the subject made me appreciate I wasn’t alone. Anyone who would deliberately endeavour to make a mother feel bad about kissing their children makes me want to sling breakable crockery and throw profanities around like confetti.
The aforementioned team have shared their personal views below. And although I wouldn’t encourage you to actively destroy perfectly useable china, do feel free to get as sweary as required in the comments box below.
{Lottie} I love a good smooch from my girls. Absolutely nothing wrong with it. NOTHING. They are my little girls and if they want to give me a kiss on the lips then so be it. I love smothering them with kisses and cuddles and adore that Molly requests a big kiss when I drop her off at pre school or that Alice wants a kiss before she goes to sleep. It doesn’t even cross my mind to think that it’s a kiss on the lips or what anyone else might be thinking. To be honest I don’t see why it should matter. A kiss makes everything better in my books, whether on the lips or not.
{Lorna} My boys aged 11 and 10 as well as my little lady aged 2 regularly kiss me, each other and their daddy on the lips, cheek, forehead, hand; basically where ever the mood takes them. Until this controversy with Victoria and Harper Beckham I never gave it a second thought that it was wrong to do so, and neither shall I be now. I genuinely think to reject a child and push them away when they are showing you affection would be more damaging to them than to embrace it and show them how much you love them in return. So I shall continue to kiss ALL my children on the lips until they tell me to stop. Affection is not something to be ashamed of and I definitely don’t want my children growing up thinking this is wrong.
{Becky} We’ve always been a family of lip kissers. My auntie and nan still kiss me on the lips. It’s totally normal for me. Leo is an extremely affectionate child and he’ll grab your face and plant a massive smacker right on your lips (and your cheeks and your nose and your forehead). For me, I want my kids to be completely in touch with their emotions and if the moment takes him that he should want to give me a great big (thankfully less dribbly these days ) kiss there’s no way I will stop him. And it works both ways. Sometimes I just love him so much the only thing I know to do is kiss his whole face off! And I will continue to do so until the end of my days.
{Lolly} We’re huge lip kissers in my family – always have been and always will be – and we’re talking everyone in my family all the way from Hector to my eighty seven year old grandfather. It’s completely and utterly normal for me and for Ste and so it will be for Hector too. In fact it’s clear he’s already absorbing the family’s tactile ways as he regularly gives the people he loves huge cuddles; there’s honestly nothing better than a ridiculously tight hug from your baby. Watching him blow slightly clumsy kisses to his Gramme and Dad breaks my heart (in a good way) every time and we all regularly smother him in kisses because honestly how can you not? It’s important to me that Hector is and continues to be comfortable expressing his emotions whether they be good or bad and that he feels he can share his feelings with me or with Ste or in fact with any member of his family and kissing is just one of those ways in which we can do this. Emotional health is as important as physical health after all. And honestly what is the world coming to if you can’t show your kids you love them through a heartfelt kiss?
{Fern} Unlike the other ladies, I don’t come from a particularly affectionate family, so being cuddly with Elle has always been really important to me. I’d love to have the type of relationship with her that I’ve been envious of other girls having with their Mums. I’ll never forget the first time she reached up to me and said ‘duddle’ before throwing her arms around my neck. So naturally, I have no problem at all when she wants to plant a big kiss on my lips, yes it’s super slobbery, but there really is nothing more lovely. This little being, who I love more than anything else in the entire world, loves me just the same back. And so I’m going to make the most of every single snuggle, cuddle and kiss.
What is wrong with people? I love to kiss all the little ones in our family on the lips. Mainly because they give me no choice, but also because they taste of Petit Filou!
The world needs more kisses xx✌❤xx
Petit filous, yum….. xx
And you my lady, I could give you a big smacker on the lips right now! You’ve made my day ???x
You are more than welcome. You know we are the shopping queens! xxx
As well as kissing Zachary on the lips (although his phase of sticking his tongue out has led me to use his cheek for now!) I have also been known to ….hold your breath all you nay sayers…planted kisses on his peachy bottom. Yes his bottom. There . I’ve said it. Feel so much better now it’s out in the open. Keep on kissing people it will make the world a better place
Their little squidgy bums are crying out for kisses aren’t they!
If you can’t kiss what you made on the lips there’s something very odd with the world.
Thank you for your honesty and for sharing your confession with Rock My Family!!!! I’ve just been giving Alice’s bum a little squidge too. xx
I kiss my babies bottom too! It’s just so peachy. I always lip kiss him and don’t understand why I wouldn’t! He now reaches out and gives lip kisses to us, and his grandparents… And his little friends. Too cute. Keep kissing. The world needs more kisses.
I kiss my boy all the time, all over his face and body, why wouldn’t anyone want to do that to their child. I pushed him out my f***y for god’s sake! Is it because people see it as ‘sexual’?? If it is, there is something seriously wrong with them in my opinion – everything has become so over sexualised; toys, tv, blah blah blah, even breastfeeding is seen as weird to some people because boobs are meant for sex aren’t they? xx (sorry for the rude words! haha 🙂 )
This whole ridiculous debate has made me so cross that I’ve already commented on your posts on Facebook AND Instagram – but I’m going to weigh in again, just because it’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever seen on social media. Why do people think they have a right to comment on how other parents raise their children? I bet they’d hesitate to walk up to someone in the street and berate them for kissing their child on the lips, but it’s easy to attack a celebrity from behind a screen.
But more than anything, I feel so sorry for these people who think it’s so wrong to kiss YOUR OWN child on the lips. They are truly missing out. There is no greater feeling in the world than being kissed by your baby. I’ll be lip kissing mine until I die. 🙂 xx
My sentiments exactly Tracy, I’ll kiss Mabel until she makes me stop! xx
I grew up in a very very tactile, bear huggy, kissy family but we never kiss on the lips. I don’t know why…..we never did but equally we were never told not too. To kiss my mum, dad, sister, nan on the lips now would make me feel weird! Please don’t misunderstand me, I’m not saying it is wrong to at all! I think it’s just what you’re used to. My husband and I are due out first little one in November (a boy!) and I fully intend to shower him with love every single moment…..whether we end up kissing him on the lips I don’t know I really haven’t even thought about it either way until this moment! I think whatever happens happens but we’ll let him lead it. And I totally agree, you should never shut down affection shown to you by your children. Happy kissing everyone!! X
Absolutely Sarah – it should be about what you’re used to/feel comfortable with. I’m sure when your little boy arrives you will shower him with kisses, lots of luck for November! xx
I’m the same Sarah. Kisses on the cheeks for my family and I think I’d find lip kisses from my mum now weird. No idea if she did it when I was little. Doesn’t mean I don’t kiss my girlies lots and if they want to kiss me on the lips then so be it. All the kisses for everyone today xx
Like almost everyone in the world, I know I kissed my Mum on the lips when I was a child and then naturally grew out of it as I got older. With no emotional scarring whatsoever! I must kiss my daughter about 100 times a day because I just can’t resist an opportunity whenever it arises. And the few times she reciprocates with a kiss on the lips literally melts my heart…
The world can sometimes be a terrible place, restricting kisses seems like the last thing we should be doing!
I didn’t think that I had taken any notice of the horrible comments online and in the media about poor Victoria Beckham until I dropped my daughter off to nursery. I went to kiss her goodbye and then completely hesitated kissing her on the lips and ended up kissing her cheek. I just kept thinking of what the other Mums and nursery staff were thinking of the kiss. I walked away to work feeling completely rotten. Rotten and then angry. I couldn’t believe that a group of random people that didn’t have anything better to do than to bully and attack a mother could influence like that. I spent the day beating myself up for stopping something that was completely natural because of people’s opinions that I didn’t even know. Never again! I am going to keep on giving my little girl a kiss (or 100’s of kisses) on the lips until she makes me stop (hopefully not for many years to come!).
I don’t come from a very affectionate family but I was always showered with kisses and cuddles from my Gran. Even in my early thirties she would cuddle up to me on the sofa and give me kisses on the lips. She died a year and a half ago and I miss this interaction so much. My husband and I are very affectionate and never leave the house without kissing each other goodbye – my dog even gets a goodbye kiss and cuddle in the morning too! When I have children they will be absolutely smothered in kisses and cuddles.
I regularly Kiss my daughter’s anywhere on their face, body and lips! In fact I even get encouragement from some of the parents I work for to happily be allowed to kiss their little ones on the lips. (I’m a child minder) although obviously this is when they are present and accepting of it. I do kiss them all on the head or cheek regularly though despite them not being mine as I feel affection when required or needed is perfectly acceptable and extremely important for a child’s self esteem and self worth but also to aid in the attachment process. The world would be full of terribly detached Hunan beings without affection like kissing (on the lips or elsewhere).
I commented on Instagram already, but I’ll do it again here. I absolutely hate all these discussions that show what an awful world we live in! Breastfeeding is bad, but showing breasts in every shower gel advertisement etc. is ok? And now this! What is wrong with showing your child affection? I miss every inch of my little baby boy (well frankly not between the legs!) and I will do so until he doesn’t want me to!
I’m actually almost annoyed at RMF for even bothering to write a post about this. It was Instgram trolling picked up by the media and given much more mileage than it ever deserved. Ridiculous!!
Ps I kiss lips and bottoms and tummies and toes too 🙂