Who do you trust to put a cold flannel on your face or to not take offence when you swear like a trooper at them? More importantly who do you want to see the not so pretty, but amazing, sight of your baby being born. It’s got to be someone very close to you that’s for sure.
When I was expecting Molly I was always pretty certain on who would be with me on the day. There was never any question that Edd would be there with me and I would imagine that for most of you having your partner there is the obvious choice. I knew that I would want him to be there for the birth of our children and I can’t imagine otherwise. It was always just a given that he would be there for that amazing moment.
However, Edd wasn’t the only one I had with me as I also asked my mum to be there. Again, it was something I always thought would happen and even Edd presumed she would be. I’m very close to my mum and she’s the one I turn to for everything so I knew she would be of great support during labour.
I didn’t do any birth classes so none of us had to sit there practicing breathing together. This was partly because I didn’t want to but also because Molly arrived early before I had the chance to. If I had I would think that would just be Edd and I rather than my mum. Having had four kids herself I’m pretty sure she knew what was going to happen!
On the day I loved having both Edd and my mum there. Let’s be honest, I could have a good old natter to mum about nothing in particular. She bought an endless supply of home magazines and we planned decorating schemes. Mum is also a trained reflexologist so I had some wonderful treatments, the midwives were very jealous! I will add here that I was induced with both labours so I had plenty of sitting around. Due to this it also meant that it could get quite boring as we spent the whole day waiting for the drip and then the contractions to kick in.
Having two people with me had some practical benefits too. One of them could easily leave the room for a drink, snack, little walk without leaving me on my own. I know this was helpful to both of them. It also meant that when I was waiting to be induced with Alice that Edd could pop home to see Molly, who was with Grandma. Oh, and pick up the bag of snacks we had left behind!
As labour kicked in I found having both of them there really calming. I’m not one for lots of brow mopping (Edd might have had the odd whack as he tried!) but he was there to hold my hand and mum, as always, knew what advice to give and how to help me through it. Neither tried to interfere or be too full on and that is exactly what I needed. The fact that they know me so well is exactly why I wanted them there.
Together we got through it and I made exactly the same choices when little Alice was making her arrival 18 months later.
It’s such a personal choice who you have with you when you go in to labour but believe me, you will need all the support you can get. Who did you choose to have at the birth?