Today I want to introduce you to the lovely Kate who is going to be sharing her pregnancy diary with you all over the coming months. We first got to know Kate when we shared her home tour over on Rock My Style (take a peek, it’s a beaut) and she is now nearly four months pregnant with her first baby. I’ll hand over to Kate to talk all about the conception and the struggles they faced getting pregnant.
Hello everyone! My name is Kate (some of you may know me as OveratKates!) I’ve been a huge fan of the Rock My… blogs for a long time now and was thrilled when they asked me to share my pregnancy journey with you all. What better place to start than with how I got pregnant. No, not the details of exactly ‘how’ but my journey from deciding that we were ready to have a baby to finally seeing that blue cross!
It was last Spring when Chris and I decided we both finally felt ready (as ready as you can for your world to be turned upside down!) for a baby of our own. Immediately after deciding I began reading a lot (too much) about how long it takes to get pregnant and ways in which you can help to speed the process along! Like many women, I threw myself into ‘trying to conceive’ completely, downloading all the apps, spending a fortune on ovulation kits and half of Holland and Barratt thinking that was going to make all the difference. I even refused to drink tap water after reading that there are so many women on the pill these days that our water is filed with oestrogen! Crazy, I know!
My first cycle turned out to be an agonising 80 days – I dread to think the amount of money I wasted on pregnancy tests in that time, not really believing but truly hoping that we had been just that lucky! When my period finally turned up I cried in the toilets at work. The next month I prepared myself to be a little more realistic but after 60 days with no sign of a period I began testing again. This cycle was an equally painful 75 days and the disappointment when I finally got my period was just as great. I was totally unprepared for how long it would take for my body to adjust after coming off the pill.
I went to my doctor, Dr. Raymond Marquette after about 6 months, I had only had two cycles in that time and wanted to know if there was anything I could do to help get them back on track. The only advice he had for me was to be patient and stop worrying. Err thanks Doc, but how do I do that?!
With some advice from the doctor I turned to my trusty forums and began to take more and more supplements and cut out things from my diet. I even banned my husband from using the steam room and sauna at work (although he admitted to me recently that he didn’t!) Months went by and the disappointment only got worse.
My cycles eventually got down to 40 days after about a year, still much longer than they should be. I went back to the doctor and they agreed to refer me for further tests. About 2 years ago I had an operation to remove some pre-cancerous cells (two weeks before my wedding – great timing!) and the doctor found that I also had endometriosis. I know some people can suffer terribly with endo, and I’m lucky in that I have never suffered greatly, but of course I had read endless facts about the impact it could have on fertility. On top of that, as a result of my extra-long cycles, the doctor suggested that I may also have PCOS. I was referred to the fertility clinic and told to wait for an appointment.
Two of my closest friends had started trying around the same time that Chris and I had and had both fallen pregnant, one almost immediately and the other in just a few months. Of course I was happy for them but I will admit I cried a lot (in private) once I found out their news. Now they were happily pregnant and sending me scan pictures while I waited to be seen at the clinic.
My appointment came around pretty quickly and Chris and I sat in the office of the gynaecologist like two scared school kids. She asked endless questions and explained that she recommended that I have the same operation again to remove my endometriosis and at the same time they would check whether my tubes were blocked. Rather matter-of-factly she told us that if they were our only option would be IVF. I came home and cried a little more but soon after felt positive that we were at least making progress. They hoped to book me in within the next three months and I accepted that I was just going to have to wait a little longer for my bundle of joy.
For the first time in a year I stopped taking my supplements and setting my alarm for 5am to take my temperature. I drank without feeling guilty that I might be pregnant and ate as much sushi as I wanted. I stopped counting and obsessing over days of my cycle and soon enough adjusted back to ‘normal’ life before getting pregnant had completely taken over our lives! We planned holidays that we had put off ‘just in case’ and I threw myself into my work and socialising again. It felt like a weight had been lifted.
At the end of the month we took a trip to Vienna. I knew I was due on at some point in the trip but honestly didn’t even notice until I was packing to come home that I hadn’t come on. Still though, the thought that I might be pregnant didn’t enter my head – I had been disappointed too many times.
We returned home from the trip to the devastating news that my Nan had passed while we were away. About a week later my Dad made a comment that sometimes someone has to leave the family to make room for a new family member. It wasn’t until he said that, that I suddenly realised that I was now over a week late. I decided that the next morning I would take a test – but honestly it was more to stop myself getting carried away than actually believing I might be pregnant.
If you haven’t guessed it already, yes that day was the day that the magic cross appeared! Followed up by several other tests (5 in total!) we couldn’t believe it – we were finally pregnant!
Now I know that to some people you will wonder what all the fuss is about?! For those of you who haven’t started trying yet or for the lucky ones who didn’t need to ‘start trying’ a year will not seem like a long time to wait. But I am sure there will be plenty of others that can relate. (I hope I’m not the only crazy obsessive person out there?!) Trying to conceive is all-consuming, it becomes the be all and end all and can easily completely take over your life.
I am also sure that there will be lots of people who will have dealt with it far better than me. I am by nature a complete worrier – Chris jokes that if I don’t have something to worry about I will find something! And maybe it’s true. All in all it took us about a year – which I know is perfectly normal but when you’re going through it, every month that passes feels like a lifetime and you can’t help but begin to wonder if it will ever happen.
I feel incredibly lucky and am so conscious not to take it for granted now that I am finally pregnant. You will never hear me moan about feeling sick, or tired or fat. I am truly grateful that is has happened for us and in the end the timing was perfect – My due date is my late Nan’s birthday – now if that’s not a sign I don’t know what is?!