Sibling Rivalry?

Charlotte O'Shea

There is a five year age gap between my little sister and I. According to my mother, and from my own foggy memory, I didn’t endeavour to relinquish the attention given to my sibling or show any signs of jealousy.

I very much saw her as my “baby” sister and either ignored her and entertained myself or attempted to entertain her. I must have understood she was a tiny defenceless human and required more of my parents time. As we got older sometimes admittedly we didn’t get on, usually because she had a habit of pinching my make-up and/or clothes but on a whole, I never had a case of the green-eyed she-has-more-attention-than-me / you-love-her-more-than-me type syndrome.

There will be an almost four year age gap between Mabel and her baby sister when she arrives in less than 5 weeks time (I know, how the hell did the last 8 months go so fast?!). We have taken time to explain to her all about the lovely times we will spend together as a family, how much her sister will love her and look up to her, how I would really appreciate her help when the baby arrives and so on.

For the most part she seems excited, and has always shown a caring and considerate nature towards her 18 month old cousin Freya, which I take to be a very positive sign.

As the arrival becomes more imminent however we seem to have had a few unexpected wobbles. I asked Mabel if she would like to feel the baby kick last week and she responded with “Mummy the baby kicking is annoying, I want to watch television”. This was followed by frustration over the fact she can no longer sit on my lap (there simply isn’t room!) and the fact I am generally much slower and more exhausted when it comes to her demands and the time we spend together.

We had a full on tantrum at the weekend because I was trying to explain that the baby’s birthday was before Mabel’s birthday in March (anyone else’s three year old obsessed with the dates of significant events?!) and the realisation the baby will be sleeping in our bedroom, not the nursery, once we return from hospital.

Friends and colleagues have advised how important it is that Mabel is told it is her sister and not “Mummy and Daddy’s new baby” and that especially when she meets her for the first time, the baby should be in her hospital cot and not being held by me.

I’m finding it all very discombobulating, especially with heightened hormones and little sleep, the anxiety and desperate desire for Mabel to accept her new sibling and welcome her with love and enthusiasm has been quite overwhelming of late.

What has been your experience of the arrival of baby number two when it comes to sibling acceptance? I know there are various books available but my time to read them is somewhat limited, however I would very much appreciate recommendations and advice in the comments section below.

P.S If you’re suffering from tired looking red puffy eyes (sleep deprivation and pregnancy hormones are common causes) then I’m sharing some tips and products to help disguise them over on Rock My Style.

Image Credit: Little Beanies

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Charlotte is still determined to wear her fancy cowboy boots, even if Mabel does plaster the tassels in jam.
Follow Charlotte on instagram @charlotte.oshea

41 Comments. Leave new

We have a two year age gap almost to the day (don’t ever think making two cakes is a good idea at 11pm). Obviously everyone’s experience is different and E was 2 whereas Mabel will be that little bit older BUT
(1) I bore the brunt of the confusion rather than her brother. I had a section so I couldn’t lift her, put her to bed in her cot etc. We’d tried to teach her how to climb in and out in advance for naps but she definately took her emotions out on me, not the baby. Which was hard when you are a writhing mess of hormones anyway.
(2) the rough patch for me in terms of sibling rivalry was about 4 months when he started moving. This was the point she realised he was going to start encroaching on her stuff. And that all her ‘special little things’ needed to be played with at higher levels etc.

Generally though, it’s wonderful. Yesterday she sighed and said ‘I think we’ll keep Fred forever won’t we’. He’s now 1 to her 3 and it was totally worth the crap to get to now. They play together, (he’s much MUCH stronger and tougher than she was at the same age and FEARLESS so everything they say about second babies is true). He thinks she’s just about the best thing ever – I caught them last week with her at the top of a chair on the kitchen ledge handing him down a biscuit. I walk in and he starts shaking his finger and saying ‘no no no’. Genius. I love watching their personalities developing together.

(Caveat : I am knackered though)

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Ooh this is such a tough one! Something that could help with her being Mabel’s sister rather than your new baby, could be that (depending on your due date) she is getting a new sister for her birthday. With my sister’s kids, my nephew was so proud to tell anyone who’d listen that he was getting a baby and a batman cake for his birthday – he was a little younger though.

On the dates thing, little E is OBSESSED with birthdays and over the last few months has seen almost everyone in her immediate family celebrate their own. She can’t quite understand why she has to wait until March and I feel so sorry for her when a cake comes out for someone else. She always seems to have that glimmer of hope in her eye that this elusive ‘March’ has arrived 😢

It sounds like you’re doing all the right things, and I’m sure Mabel will be besotted with her new baby sister from the moment she sees her ❤️xxx

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Charlotte O'Shea
29th January 2018 8:21 am

Ah thanks Karen, Mabel is just like E – all these party invitations and she can’t understand why she has to wait so long for hers! I’ve tasked James with organising her party this year as it will be less than 3 weeks from when the baby is born and I’m just not sure I can face the chaos (!)

I’m sure Mabel will love her to bits, I just need to make sure I give her enough attention so she doesn’t feel as though it’s all about the baby x

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I worried too much about how my eldest would cope with the new baby, I wish I’d chilled out about it more! I even took him to his usual playgroup just one week after having a c section, just because I worried that he would resent having his baby brother disrupt his routine!
He has actually been an amazing big brother right from the start, they cause all sorts of trouble together now that they are 3.5 and 1yr old!

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Charlotte O'Shea
29th January 2018 8:22 am

Jane this is lovely to hear, and bless you going to playgroup a week after a c-section, that is commitment right there!

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I really worried about this! There is an 18 month gap between our oldest two and then 3 years between number 2 and 3. When our second was born, I think our son was too young to really understand what was going on, especially when I was pregnant and the baby was a concept rather than a reality! When his sister did arrive we tried a few things; the baby ‘bought him a present’ to say thanks for being her big brother. I also set aside a box of his favourite toys and books and would get that box out so we had special mummy/George time (I would get the box out and play while I breast fed sat on the floor resting my back on the sofa so he didn’t always feel like I was too busy for him!) I tried to sometimes include him in baby related jobs so that it also kept him busy too, he loved to help bath her for example (with the added benefit of super cute photo ops!!!)

When baby Ted arrived our oldest was 4.5 and the middle one had just turned 3. They were much more aware of the changes but also much more excited and involved in his arrival and he just sort of slotted in! The biggest problem in the early days was the arguments over whose turn it was for a cuddle or to hold him! 14 months on and we’ve had a few moments of resentment or irritation that he’s taking their stuff or stopping me being able to do things with them but as a general rule, they love him to bits and are really nurturing and mothering towards him (although the big two fight like cat and dog so it’s not all peace, love and harmony!)

One thing we try to do is to try to build some time in for them individually- either ten minutes in the house where they get undivided attention doing something or a trip out with either mummy or daddy on their own which they love. When Ted was a couple of weeks old, Esme went through a bit (more) of a tantrumy phase; my sister looked after the baby for a couple of hours and we went out to buy some new hair clips and have a coffee! It pretty much instantly fixed the behaviour issues just having a couple of hours knowing that we’d not phased her out!! I think we worry so much but the reality for me was that the newbies just sort of fit in! Good luck with it all! Xxx

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Charlotte O'Shea
29th January 2018 8:47 am

Hi Rachel, James and I definitely need to make sure we each have some time with Mabel alone, especially in the early days when the baby can’t be left alone for more than a minute. I’m planning on a few coffee shop/park trips and James will take her swimming etc

Thanks for sharing your experience and seemingly managing 3 so well, I can’t even begin to imagine! x

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I had a similar sentiment to having 3- our third was a surprise after battling infertility for years and having IVF for the first two- I’d be lying if I didn’t admit to a small amount of hyperventilating when the blue line appeared! We have good hours and bad hours but I think you eventually just settle into a routine that works for you and find short cuts to make life easier!

I love my little trips with them as individuals! It’s so nice to get time to enjoy them and see them grown into awesome little humans on a one to one (likewise watching the madness unfold when they are all together is equally as fun!)xxx

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Charlotte O'Shea
29th January 2018 10:35 am

Rachel I bet the madness is in qual parts chaotic and brilliant 🙂

I’m hoping and praying for a routine of sorts – I have everything crossed x

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There’s a (looking back!) crazy small age gap between my two eldest and so the big one didn’t understand what was happening and did struggle for the first few months- nothing awful but became clingier to all of us (Me, my husband and the baby!) and was obviously a bit discombobulated by it. But I think much of that can be helped by understanding they have if they are a bit older.

I also tried to spend some one on one time with my older one in those first weeks whilst my husband was on paternity leave to lessen any feelings of displacement.

Straight from when one became two though their relationship has been something that never fails to make me smile and just warm my heart (a bit cheesy sorry!). Now they play together (and fight of course at times!) but watching them together is my favourite thing.

Lots of people told me that once the baby comes it’s like they’ve always been there and been in your family and for us that was true. You’ve got such an exciting time ahead, wishing you lots of luck and sending tissues for the moment your babies meet for the first time!

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There is almost 3 years between my daughter and son. Having seen friends have their second with a smaller age gap and go through a tough transition, I lowered my expectations and gritted my teeth.

I would say there was around a month where our daughter punished the hell out of us (bad behaviour, disrupted sleep and general upset) but it was never directed towards the baby – she loved him from the off.

I genuinely think every child reacts differently, but the best advice I can give is lower your expectations and just hang in there until the baby starts smiling and giving back a little, because I can guarantee that the biggest smiles (and eventually giggles) will be saved for Mabel, which she will love, and there truly is nothing better than seeing that magical sibling bond developing.

Good luck Charlotte – I promise that after a few short weeks you’ll struggle to remember a time before your two beautiful girls were filling your arms and heart together xxx

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Charlotte O'Shea
29th January 2018 8:53 am

Ah Olivia thanks for such a lovely message, I actually welled up at your last sentence (I seem to be teary every day at the moment!). Mabel’s other cousin Eira constantly watches her and smiles at her (Eira is 6 months) when she’s around so I’m hoping for the same with her sister – Mabel loves that she is the favourite! x

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Hope you’re feeling OK still Charlotte – you are looking amazing but know I found the last few weeks v tiring! Nothing to add from me – we’re currently debating when to try for number 2 and I swing wildly from wanting a small gap and the baby years “done” to waiting (mainly because I hate being pregnant).

On a separate note, could you do a write up of your Sani holiday (not that you haven’t got a million and one other things to think about!) at some point. We’re looking for a family friendly break and would love to hear your thoughts!

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Charlotte O'Shea
29th January 2018 8:58 am

Hi Emma! I am actually finding these last few weeks really challenging, especially with sleeping (lack of – my legs keep going numb and my hips pinch all night) but I just keep thinking I’m at the last “leg” of the journey now and I never ever have to be pregnant again (!)

I was the same as you though – I said we should discuss having number 2 when Mabel was 1, that came around and I just couldn’t imagine having two under 2, but each to their own/what suits your circumstances. I will absolutely try and compile a review of Sani – Mabel STILL asks when we are going back to Greece to clearly she loved it! x

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Have you tried tonic water or bananas for your legs?! I struggled really badly with twitchy numb legs in pregnancy- apparently quinnine In tonic and potassium in bananas are really good for it! It did motive mine! X

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Charlotte O'Shea
29th January 2018 9:05 pm

Rach I have eaten a banana and made James bring tonic water home!!! I’m trying both so fingers crossed x

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It’s so tough isnt it – if you haven’t already tried it I can’t recommend reflexology enough in the last few weeks. Really helped me sleep and I think helped with water retention.

V glad to hear mabel enjoyed herself! Trying to find a balance between “family friendly” and a “nice” resort!

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Lyra is obsessed with these kind of things too!(‘Mummy, how many minutes is it until morning?’ ‘When is it going to be spring?’ ‘How many days until my birthday?’).

Like Rachel said, a present from the baby when Mabel first meets her will definitely go down well…Lyra was delighted with a talking Skye from Paw patrol. She was also bought this very sweet book which explains what an important and ace job it is to be a big sister:

https://www.awin1.com/cread.php?awinmid=3787&awinaffid=251171&clickref=&p=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.waterstones.com%2Fbook%2Fim-a-big-sister%2Fjoanna-cole%2Frosalinda-kightley%2F9780061900624

xx

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There’s 3 years nearly to the day between my 2 with my little boy sneaking in 8 days before my elder daughters birthday (that will be expensive in 18 years time…) Our daughter loves her baby brother so much & tells him every day that he is her best friend. She is so helpful too & I try to give her responsibility for helping to look after him- get favourites are choosing his clothes, helping change his nappy & entertaining him on his play mat. He so obviously adores her too & the unconditional love is plain to see. I know it’s not going to always be that way so relishing those moments now. Kids are amazing & soon adapt to the changes & soon enough it’ll be like it’s always been the 4 of you. Organisation is key though, mummy guilt increases ten-fold, & some days will be a lot tougher than others. One thing I would say is that it can get a lot lonelier- last time we were surrounded by our nct friends who all had ones the same age & popping for a coffee was fairly easy- now we nearly all have 2 each of varying ages & is a military operation.

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I remember my baby sister gave me a Barbie when she was born – I thought she was pretty awesome from then on really! This is a timely post for me. My second son is due in June and there will be a a 2 year age gap almost to the day if he’s on time. I’m beginning to get really worried about how my first will cope with a new baby and all the changes that will bring and how best to help him through it. We started taking about the baby in mummy’s tummy fairly early on and he seems to get there is a baby in there and he certainly talks about the baby at nursery but he can’t know what impact that baby is going to have. We have also bought him a couple of books about babies and being a big brother which he loves to read with us so I’m hoping that at least when the baby arrives and he becomes a big brother he can understand to some degree what is happening even if the shock of not being the sole focus of our attention takes a while to subside.
Good luck Charlotte – I look forward to hearing about how you are all in getting on in a good few months time x

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Charlotte O'Shea
29th January 2018 10:40 am

Hi Sophie, I definitely think I need to purchase a “Big Sister” book, I’ll have a butchers at Amazon this afternoon.

It’s great your son seems to have an understanding of what’s to come, and certainly when they are a little older I bet they will play together all the time x

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There are 2 years and 2 days between my two, so Noah was that hit younger. I was very worried. I won’t lie; the first 12 weeks were a rollercoaster for all of us. I was less patient in fact, I look back and cringe at how snappy I was with the poor little chap. His sleep took a hit, but actually it all passed very quickly. Isabel is now almost 6 months and they adore each other. Not an ounce of rivalry ;currently). The first thing he asks for when he wakes up is a cuddle with his sister. He loves making her giggle, and sitting and chatting to her. He ‘helps’ change her nappy, and ‘reads’ her bedtime story. I’ve found little snippets of time just for him help. She goes to bed before him so he ‘helps’ get her ready then he gets stories and cuddles to himself. When she naps he helps me make dinner or we play together the two of us.

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There is also nearly 4 years between my oldest daughter and my twins who are nearly 6 months. My daughter loves “her babies” and I was worried (and still worry) she would feel left out but so far that hadn’t been the case. We have done a couple of things to help her feel special including get her a present from the babies when they were born. We got her a camera and took her to take pictures of the babies for us and to take pictures of what she was up to while I was in hospital to share with me. That seemed to work well as a distraction and to keep her entertained. Also, although we had some offers from people to take her out when the babies were first home, we sensed she wanted to stay home with us so kept those days at a minimum. And now the babies are a bit bigger, we try to do some activities just with my older daughter so she has some special time with us too. Overall I think it is a great age gap, my older daughter loves the attention the babies get, she is able to help and she still goes to her nursery meaning she gets some time doing things with children her own age while i do baby classes etc. Congratulations on your new baby, such exciting times ahead.

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Charlotte I hope you are doing ok, I found that last month very exhausting with number two. I do think the build up to the arrival of the second baby and the worry of how you will cope and more significantly how your eldest will respond and feel is so great that actually you will feel so relieved when your baby is here you are all settled as a family of four. Does that make any sense?!
My only advice, which is something someone said to me, is that Mabel will remember the first few months and baby won’t so give her as many hugs as possible. It also really helped me that my family were on board with this and gave my eldest the attention when they visited and just snuck a few baby cuddles in. It was actually having to share granny and grandad that my little boy wasn’t happy about!
And as a lot of people have already said watching that sibling relationship flourish is just the best thing ever 💕

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Charlotte O'Shea
29th January 2018 9:06 am

Hi Ella! I think I’ve got to that stage where the panic is setting in slightly – in terms of, we don’t have anything “ready” for the baby really, the concern over Mabel’s acceptance, and then stupid things like the fact we haven’t booked a holiday and if we leave it until after the baby arrives we might not get what we want etc etc, I think I just need to feel a little more organised and hopefully then I’ll be less stressed.

I’m taking a good few weeks off before the baby arrives (providing she doesn’t decide to come early obviously!) as with Mabel I was directing a photoshoot at 38 weeks and writing posts the night before my c-section date. Bonkers when I look back, I can’t believe I allowed (or anyone else allowed me!) to do that. I’m positive the lack of rest and stress contributed to a more difficult recovery in the medium term. This time I’m much more relaxed when it comes to work – family and health comes first, always.

Anyway sorry for waffling, it’s clearly been on my mind! x

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We have a just over three year age gap and that has worked well for my son and daughter. We kept making Aaron feel involved throughout the pregnancy and referred to the baby as, our baby, never mummy and daddy’s baby etc. As others have suggested he went on a special trip to pick a present, a favourite cuddly toy for the baby. We bought him a present from her too, which went down well. We also got him a camera (kids one), so he could take pictures of his new sister when she arrived. Extended family were here and spent time taking him on trips etc in the early days and we kept his routine, nursery days etc in place. This may be a step too far for some but he also, “picked” her name. He picked between our two favourites, Chloe and Maya, so she is Chloe with Maya as a middle name. Chloe is 1 now and Aaron 4 and they interact really well. Sure sometimes they annoy each other and fight for space on my knee but on the whole we have been lucky. Oddly the one place Aaron demonstrated the green eyed monster is with my mum, he accepted he had to share me but took longer to adjust to the idea of sharing granny! Hope some of the advice you are getting helps and good luck when the time comes for baby to arrive.

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Charlotte O'Shea
29th January 2018 10:43 am

Catriona I really like the idea of the camera as a gift – thanks for the inspiration. Maya was actually one of our names for Mabel! James and I both read the same book when we first got together and it was the main girls name in the novel. x

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My big girl was 2yr 8m when her little sister arrived. I had thought this would be an ideal age gap but in hindsight think a bigger gap would have helped my eldest. As it was, she was old enough to understand what had changed but too young to really understand or manage her emotions. My biggest tip is to keep things the same for Mabel where you can, I.e preschool days, days with your parents. We changed a lot all at once and we don’t think that helped. But the tough bits didn’t last long. I did ‘lovebombing’ with my eldest (look it up, lots of good tips), which helped. My girls are now 4 and 20m and my goodness, they absolutely adore each other. My little one is very quiet, gentle and sweet and her loud, feisty big sister looks after her very carefully. It’s amazing watching them together. Best of luck with it all x

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Charlotte O'Shea
29th January 2018 10:50 am

Abi that’s an excellent tip on keeping routine the same as much as you can, I am not taking Mabel out of nursery, although I am planning on picking her up earlier some days when it becomes lighter so I can take her and her sister to the park and whatnot, I’m not sure she fully understands I will be at home with the baby whilst essentially she isn’t – she does enjoy nursery though so I’m hoping she understands and doesn’t feel left out.

SO lovely to hear how well your girls get on! Off to investigate “lovebombing” x

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Hi Charlotte, how exciting that Baby 2 is arriving so soon!

I had similar worries when I was expecting Joshua, especially as Isabella had had me to herself for just under 4 years so very similar, but we talked about the baby as much as we could (without going overboard) saying things like how she was going to be an amazing big sister, that the baby would love her and want to play with her when he or she was older etc. We also bought Isabella a present from Joshua when he arrived. Towards the birth she did have a few tantrums, similar to you with her being frustrated that I couldn’t do certain things or cuddle her properly with my big bump and we did have an alrighty meltdown when I bought the baby its first Jelly Cat Penguin which she DEFINITELY WANTED!!

We made sure that Joshua was in his cot when she came into the hospital room, she went over quickly to see him and to say hello but then ran to be with me. Unfortunately we ended up being back in hospital almost as soon as we got home as Joshua was constantly being sick and they didn’t know what was wrong with him so we were there for another 5 days on top of the 4 days during his birth so I think that impacted somewhat how she reacted initially to him as I had been away for so long having him.

She was careful around him and inquisitive and I tried to include her as much as possible, asking her to help me change his nappy, get his clothes, bath him, give him milk as we ended up using a bottle so doing things like that will help her feel involved. However, I won’t like and we did have some very big meltdowns during the first couple of months which were exhausting and upsetting but eventually it just stopped. There’s no way of knowing how your little one is going to react but I think the key is to remember to include them as much as possible, if you can perhaps spend some quality time with her on her own whilst Daddy or grandparents look after the new baby and so something nice with her be it going to the park or to see friends. We took Isabella to Disneyland when he was one, whilst Nana looked after Joshua so she could have some quality Mummy/Daddy & Isabella and she had just finished her first year at school.

Wishing you all the luck with both the birth and with Mabel, whatever happens she will get used to the new baby xx

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Ahhhhh time goes so fast!

I recommend reading Janet Lansbury’s website on this as it helped so much when P was born, 2 years and 4 days after S. Very much focused on reassuring her that her feelings are ok, that she is loved and accepted, lots of “it’s ok to feel cross because he did x or y, but it’s not ok to shout and push him.”

As others have said a) I bore the brunt of the acting out whereas she loved him at the start (which is fine) and b) now that he is 10 months (10 months!!) and stealing all her toys/turning off the TV he is driving her nuts and having to repeat all the little “it’s ok to be..” mantras.

Looking back she was so little and we expected so much from her and I was so tired and snappy. My poor big baby. Definitely think you were smart to have a bigger gap!

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Oh also feeding time was her story time. Would sit in her room and sit her on other side of lap with P on boob and read as many stories as we could fit in. Some lovely times 💕

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A tough one! I had 2 under 2 so I’m not sure my son was completely aware of what was going on but things definitely changed. He did get the hump with me for quite a while when we brought baby home but we made an effort to dedicate some one-on-one time with him which helped enormously.

I thought most of my time would be taken up with new baby but I found coping with a newborn the second time round a lot easier than the first. Yes you’re knackered but it’s not as overwhelming and it was no way as bad as I’d anticipated / kept myself awake at night worrying about. Enjoy the time they’re sleeping to spend time with your eldest or ask her to help with bathtimes or choosing clothes for the baby. Do some role play with a doll – she could have her own ‘baby’? And if you can, keep your eldest in Nursery to dedicate some extra special bonding time with baby (and naps for yourself).

Hope that helps x

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Ooh loving all these hints and tips!! Our daughter will be about 2 and a half when her brother arrives. Thankfully she loves babies and last time we visited a really little one she just wanted to lie on the play mat with him and play (albeit with a watchful eye to make sure he wasn’t squashed!!). So fingers crossed. But I suspect the reality of a baby that doesn’t go to its own home somewhere else could cause a few meltdowns… My main worry is that my daughter is a real mummy’s girl and wants to have cuddles and be carried all the time despite our best efforts otherwise!! It looks like I’m heading for a c-section this time so I’m concerned she will resent not being able to be picked up the whole time, although obviously I will try to cuddle as much as possible, and thankfully have family booked in already to help for the first few weeks.

I’ve been told all about making sure you have a present for the eldest, and a present from the eldest to the baby, and like you say making sure you aren’t holding the baby when they first meet. I also bought a book for my daughter which is a bit old for her really, I’ll look it up when I get home, but it an activity book all about babies, getting them dressed etc. We have the Princess Polly book about being a big sister too but I suspect Mabel is too old for that sort of thing. Best of luck with the arrival of no. 2 and hope you get to have a rest before the little one arrives. x

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I think that whatever age gap you have been siblings there will be some difficulties. We have 20 months between our boys, and it is hard explaining to the 2 and a bit year old not to shove his baby bro when he grabs the best tractor 🙄 Now the baby is crawling nothing is safe! “Share” is a widely used word in our house! However for all the hard moments nothing is more lovely when they play together and the eldest helps the baby 💔
I always try and just concentrate on the eldest when the baby is having his morning nap rather than do housejobs, when I make the effort it definitely makes his behaviour much better the rest of the day. It must be so hard for him to have this invader & I try to remember that when my patience is wearing thin (every day…)

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*between siblings

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Caroline Davis
29th January 2018 1:10 pm

There are 4 years between by 2 boys and when my second was born there was initially some jealousy which was in the form of the 4 year old acting more baby-like and crying for attention, which he had stopped previously. There was 1 episode of a pillow placed on babys face (which I obviously took off immediately!). But all of this only lasted a short time and now they are 2 and 6 they are best buddies and love playing together and I often here them giggling together in a room or hiding. The 2 year old wants to be like hia big bro ao much and his big bro loves making him laugh and impressing him! So no advice in avoiding jealousy I’m afraid, just to say that it passes and in the end there is sibling love (and some bickering!) and so much fun and company for each other that its all worth it! Plus they entertain each other at times so more rest for me in the long run! X

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Charlotte O'Shea
29th January 2018 2:39 pm

Caroline I’m really hoping for the rest you mention! Mabel has literally only just started to entertain herself properly – well for a 30 minute stretch, before than it was 5 minutes if we were lucky then it was back to demands for our time/attention. I got to the stage where I had to involve her in sorting out the washing otherwise nothing would get done!

I’m so glad to hear even with 4 years that they get on so well (most of the time!) x

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No advice as I’m currently bouncing on a yoga ball to encourage number 2 to make an appearance soon (39+4 today and impatient to meet him!) but thanks for all the tips everyone! 😘

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